After my boyfriend and I broke up, I was lonely so I put an ad on Craigslist. What is it about a man that makes him think sending a picture of his private parts is going to turn a woman on?

A little mystery and anticipation is a great thing. I put the ad under “women seeking men.” Hoping to find a decent guy to have some casual sex and a little distraction. I guess I could have put it under “casual encounters,” but, wouldn’t that make me seem a little promiscuous?

I met my ex through Craigslist actually. I put up an ad with me in a police outfit. I looked like hooker. Cocky hips and smirk on face. His was the one response out of over two hundred that I wanted to answer. Words get me every time.

This time the responses were just as overwhelming. Men send a picture of their face or flaccid small penis–no words. Some are married and think that along with being overweight, balding, and unable to spell, I am going to want to sleep with them. Then there are the guys who send bad poetry or a form letter without ever having read the actual ad.

Here are examples of a tame ad:

“everything is giv and take or it will break. I love a challenge not a fight. write back and see where this goes. “

“I am 6’4″ 200lbs dark hair with brown eyes. I am 41 yrs old and run or workout. I work in the Computer dept of a newspaper in brooklyn. Like to go out to restaurant and museums. Also like the beach (Live near Long Island ) and snowboarding. Write back soon X.”

Some guys will send a note in all blue captitals with a phone number which says, “Call me baby.”

A lot of men send pictures with their nephews or mothers. As if I would ever write them back!

Here’s another example of a response: “I have never kissed a woman but I know in my heart you and I are destined to be soul mates. I await your call.”

Or: “I want you to piss in my mouth and treat me like a dog. Tie me up, sit on me, use my mouth as a brush on your toilet. All day at work I have to be in charge. I want a woman to make me submit to her in every way. Take a strap-on and force me to like it.” When I posted the picture of me in the cop’s uniform, at least fifty men told me they wanted me to arrest them. So original.

The great thing about Craigslist is that one can order up virtually anything these days. Friends of mine have “hired” slaves for sex parties. My sister found her roommate there. Need an editor or to hire a van to move you? It’s all there. The beauty of the internet.

Actually I have met many friends through Craigslist. I don’t enjoy clubs and am shy. I like to email but don’t talk on the phone. So it’s a great thing.

But back to the men who answer the ads. They send pictures without even knowing if the person on the other end is real, what gender, anything really. I don’t understand. I think that the sites like this have been the cause for many an affair being found out. Cheating and cheated spouse need only open the email of his/her partner to discover a myriad of telling facts.

This time, out of the plethora of horrid responses, I think I may have found the one for an affair. It’s really not that difficult. Delete, delete, and eventually one will be just fine.