You are currently viewing the stories for June, 2006

Tour Guide to the Real New York City

by 06/30/2006
Neighborhood: East Village

I have no kids and never wanted any, so I was a bit anxious about playing tour guide for my 14 year old niece, Shannon, on her first visit to New York City. But my brother John said she could not wait to see Manhattan. It was quite a trip for an eighth grader from […]

My Place in Women’s Tennis History

by 06/29/2006
Neighborhood: Upper East Side

Sometimes I acquire personal training and kickboxing clients simply by correcting a stranger’s form. To put it bluntly, 90% of people in gyms are without a fuckin’ clue when it comes to proper training techniques. These folks can negotiate deals for zillions during the day at the office, yet they’re incapable of a quality bicep […]

Moving with My Father

by 06/29/2006
Neighborhood: Chinatown

My dad was helping me, his oldest daughter, carry a stuffed duffel bag up a dirty Chinatown staircase, in a dirty Chinatown building, with no-longer-usable brooms on the landings and cigarette butts on the sills. We could hear babies crying though the walls, drowning out television sets. He asked if I was sure I would […]

Bonfire of the Remedies

by 06/28/2006
Neighborhood: Clinton

My mother’s narrow little medicine chest is a joke to her. It’s quaint. It’s for amateurs. She keeps her medicine in the kitchen cabinet and the kitchen drawers and the candy dishes. Her canisters for coffee and flour and sugar are filled with Lipitor and Propranalol and Prozac. She could collapse from overmedication at any […]

Of Braggarts, Liars, and Their Adoring Misery

by 06/22/2006
Neighborhood: Brooklyn, Red Hook

June 14th 2006 3:30 pm Philadelphia “Who are these fucking people? They’ve been following me for years. Why the hell are they bent on exposing me as goddamned fraud?” I did a little research of my own and was disturbed to find that they were not only my closest friends, but my family as well. […]

The New Season

by 06/22/2006
Neighborhood: Bronx, Outer Boroughs

The Mets are out of town. My childhood friend Jim wants to see a ballgame before he’s tied up remodeling his Long Island house, which he estimates will take all of his free time May through October. He can’t wait until the Amazins, his favorite team and mine, return from a trip to the West […]

Like the Tears of a Clown

by 06/22/2006
Neighborhood: Union Square

The other week I was waiting for the subway at Union Square. I was glancing around the station looking to see if the train was coming, when all of a sudden I caught the eye of a man in a clown outfit. He winked at me and started walking in my direction. I’m not usually […]

In Search of a New Season: For the Knicks and the Rest of Us

by 06/15/2006
Neighborhood: Greenwich Village

Since my boyfriend, Alexis, injured his shoulder playing pick-up basketball, he’s been watching games from the sideline. Usually he’ll just stop for a couple of minutes, en route to wherever he—or we—are going. If a pick-up buddy says, “What’s up?” he’ll sometimes give them one of those street-hugs, where they grab each other’s hand and […]

Men Threw Balls To One End, Then Back Again: Scientology

by 06/15/2006
Neighborhood: Clinton

Jake’s girlfriend broke up with him, so he started driving and turned up eleven hours later at my apartment. We were the kind of friends who’d been close once but who didn’t speak often anymore, owing not to any particular falling out, but to the passage of time and a mutual inability to put any […]

Katrina Did One Good Thing

by 06/14/2006
Neighborhood: Letter From Abroad

It sounds like Harlem when black people in New Orleans talk, but way more so. They open their mouths and cane syrup sounds roll out. “Awright, Sugar. Heego, dawlin’,” said the steam table lady serving shrimp as I lunched at a conference that brought me recently to this gorgeous, mangled city. I asked where she […]

Mr. Beller’s Neighborhood’s Greatest Hits: A Truncated Retrospective

by The Editors 06/09/2006
Neighborhood: Multiple, SoHo

Hello. The 6th Anniversary of Mr. Beller’s Neighborhood is here, and the time has come to pay tribute to the site’s past. So many pieces are coming in all the time, piling up on the surface of the site, that it’s easy to forget how much terrific work has accumulated in the deeper layers of […]

The Girl on the Bus and the Irish Invader

by 06/08/2006
Neighborhood: Times Square

I hit the same bus every morning, Monday to Friday. It comes at 7:03 am. It doesn’t matter whether I am running late or if I am ahead of schedule. I never miss this particular bus. To make it, I will sprint like my life depends on it; I will chase the bus two blocks […]